Tuesday, December 31, 2013

Thee King is Coming

Chase after The Risen Christ with all of your heart, soul, and mind...now...and  until                                                                 He comes for you... 
He is soon to come. 
Get Ready, Be Ready, and Stay Ready. 
Let us prepare to GATHER UPON THE SHORES OF THE LORD to celebrate HIS RETURN!!! 

Our King is coming!!! Put on your wedding attire!!!

     Liberty Dawn, 1/1/2014 AD

Friday, September 6, 2013


As I open up "my doors" to you, each time I am challenged to go deeper - knowing that my humanity is intrinsically linked to yours.  I pray that your deliverance, your joy, your growth & triumph as a human being, as a CHILD OF GOD will flow from this blog.  In fact, before I go any further, I'm breaking the status quo right here, right now with the name, "BLOG." From this point forward, please know that I'm no longer "BLOGGING." Know that I'm WRITING LOVE LETTERS TO YOUR SOUL... That just sounds right to me:) I hope you're feelin' this thing too:) 

If I have not made it to your home yet with my letters, believe me, I will.  I am committed to this mission and look forward to speaking with you again. My next love letter will post soon.  In the meantime, keep your candles lit and STAY ALERT.

Until we meet again...


Friday, August 30, 2013

Before The Takeover: A Warm Wind

It feels like yesterday

and yet it's been eight years since you knocked upon my door.
So many times before I thought I might have heard something -
a gentle rap followed by a soft voice.  But I chose to keep moving, keep busy -
preoccupy myself with people and things and dreams -
bitter realities, false senses of security, illusions of perfection, procrastination,   disingenuous love
and bottled solutions taking me only so high.
I was living the life of a fictitious woman -
the woman I had become.

Finally, the day came -

a beautiful summer day, when I walked into the sanctuary BROKEN,
but not admitting it -
Still smiling at the crowd, still posing in the mirror, still conversing with friends
about incremental and monumental gains in my life -
All the while my tongue feeling thick and heavy -
incessant throbbing between my ears as if my mind was angry at the thought of sending me words to spew out for no reason and piercing no one.
I was so tired, but still fighting my sleep -
so conscious of time, which I had concluded was my enemy.

It was a little after 2 o'clock and I sat within the first pews, waiting for the crowd to leave. I was waiting for something to happen -

wanting something to overcome me and bring me to a place where peace
would finally prevail and cast a glow about me,
inviting others to inquire about the freedom in my life
or about the ability to lay hold of peace in the middle of a storm,
experiencing the blessing of closing my eyes and truly resting -
not worrying about tomorrow or anything that happened "today."

So I began to pray softly, silently to myself as I heard others being prayed for

about sickness and substance abuse, finances and forgiveness.
The hard oak pews had begun to make my thighs and behind ache for sitting so long,
but I continued to dig deeper for answers about deliverance.
I wanted freedom from all the years of putting on a jovial face
while I was dying inside -
so many years of "living" life where lies abounded so I could hide.

At last,

it was as if something began to divide within me -
the separation of lies from truth, dark from light, clean from tainted, pretense vs. reality of who I was and what I had become.  As this was shown to me,
I began to cry as if I had had tears stored up in what were  freshly punctured barrels. Then, I felt someone take my hand as I continued to cry out to God and thank Him
for His mercy and His forgiveness, His LOVE and PROTECTION,
especially throughout all the years that I chose to ignore His Knock -
ignore His Voice, calling me from the only life I knew.
Here He was offering me THE BEST LIFE -
silencing that persistent question in my mind: "Is this all there is?!?"
Boyfriends with empty promises, pockets with holes,
momentary highs upon sexual plateaus??? Lying out at the beach,
shopping, eating, drinking, dreaming -
my moods changing by the hour, sometimes by the minute...

I opened my eyes to see the woman who had begun to lead me up to the front of the altar.  She stopped at the first pew and released my hand.  Then, she stepped in front of me and began to pray with her hand raised above my forehead.  I stared at her moist palm as she prayed for me and as I prayed quietly for myself.

Suddenly, I felt this warm wind blow inside my body.

I had no idea what was happening to me.  
All I knew was that the sensation was
gentle and yet powerful at the same time -
So amazingly gentle that all I could do was envision my body falling onto a bed of billowy, white clouds -
So powerful that it blew me down, but I had no desire to break my fall -
No desire to reach out for support. It was as if I floated there, peacefully , feeling the contrast of my warm body against the cold floor as tears flowed from my eyes into my hair.

It felt like LOVE, itself, had actually stepped outside of our intellectual definitions;

it was no longer simply a word we toss around in poems or sing about in music -
For Love, in that moment, had wrapped HIMSELF around my body and come to dwell within me.


Friday, August 23, 2013



There was a time when I prayed for death. 
I wanted it to wash over me like a wave, 'til I was floating in the midst of it - knowing nothing, seeing nothing, and most importantly, feeling nothing.  I needed the pain to completely subside and put an end to the Voices, which had begun to torment me around the clock, telling me that my only path to peace was through my own death.  So I decided to take matters into my own hands - bring some "peace" to the situation, and I remember reciting these words over and over in my mind, "I resign, I resign, I resign," as I plotted to take my own life.

But, this was not a spirit I began battling in my adult life - No.  It began early in my childhood - imagine that.  There was this dichotomous split between the little girl who wanted to live and the "other me," who would try and cut side deals with our Creator to "just kill me."  Obviously, since this is current day and I am present to write this letter to you, then God, Our Father, whom I used to affectionately call, "my little goddy," thankfully did not oblige; He had already allowed the killing of His own Son instead - for you and me, but we'll leave that discussion for another time.  

As a little girl, I saw God as this pint size person whom I loved and cared for dearly, like He was my own child.  Wherever we'd go, I invited little goddy to ride shotgun as we climbed into the backseat of my parents car and talked about  everything, even how they got along (my mom, at first, was a bit concerned about these conversations). No matter, God became my best friend. I enjoyed Him even more than my imaginary mates because, unlike them, He could play with me in my dreams - we even rode a roller coaster together.  How COOL is that ?!?!?!  
Anyway, God knew things, cool things, which He'd share with me.  I believed they were mysterious secrets about life, so I always imagined I was a bit like Bond, but better.  

Now, in order for me to paint a more complete picture of the darkness with which we first began, I need for you to understand that my life originated in light.  In fact, it was akin to being bathed in it; I woke, slept, played, prayed, thanked, and sang to God.  Remember this was my BFF;  I asked Him to let me brush His hair...He taught me how to fly in my sleep - away from the bad guys...He let me look into His firey red eyes in my dreams and I listened to His voice tell me secret things while He, in turn, listened to ME! Yes, my childhood holds many beautiful memories of our time together.   So, for the life of me, I could not reconcile how SUDDENLY, this suicidal nemesis from without could find its way within - making me want to do things that "the Spirit of me would cry for."  What door had been opened? By whom? Was there an actual "door" ajar (within me), leaving me vulnerable to this mental, spiritual attack?!?! Where did it come from? Was it my parents occasional drama leaving its mark? And finally, do I tell anyone?!?!......"No," I heard the voice say, "people will think you're crazy...  Anyway, you're stronger than that. Just say some prayers and you'll be fine - think positive."  So, I kept smiling.

Years passed and there I was doing life my way, but INSIDE I was battling something that was completely nonsensical.  Two minds were facing off, contending for the rise and fall of the same life: MINE.  The circumstances ranged from failing a test in school to something much weightier, like the breaking of my heart.  Nevertheless, there were "triggers," and when they went off, the voices would resound - even my own voice seem to join "the party," and blamed me for everything that wasn't PERFECT.

But wait, there's more....
# The Takeover, L.D. 

Friday, August 16, 2013

A Love Story for the Procrastinator

Never Say "Tomorrow"

Even now, after six long years, the thought of Mary Ellen overwhelms me.  As I reminisce on what a lovely woman she was, I am simultaneously reminded of her death and how negligence and procrastination hindered me from keeping my word.  

Mary Ellen was the first and only boss I ever really loved and respected.  She was a tall, blond-haired woman in her mid-fifties who possessed the vitality and enthusiasm of a teenage girl.  Her personality was so warm and inviting that it always left me wanting to be in her presence just a little while longer. When she smiled, I could feel her sincerity.  In fact, it is that same smile that's visible in a photo taken at my wedding.

I can vividly recall the day that I became the receptionist at her court-reporting firm.  I was apprehensive about meeting her after hearing that she was not only the "head person in charge" but the owner of the firm as well.  In my mind, this translated into ONE thing: a superiority complex.

Every administrative job I'd ever had left me with tainted images of my "Superiors."  My bosses repeatedly turned out to be condescending individuals who reveled in creating an atmosphere of supposed class distinction between management and administration. I had experienced, firsthand, what it was like to be reprimanded over a PA system while the clients and I stood mortified in the lobby.  I knew how awkward it felt to have to ask that the assignments for the day be placed ON my desk and not tossed onto the floor!

Yes, quickly I discovered that Mary Ellen was not a replica of any of these early experiences but a welcomed breath of fresh air.  Unlike her peers, it was natural for her to speak to me and inquire about my life outside of work, as opposed to just stopping by my desk to pick up messages.  At her request, I was included in the monthly office meetings and birthday celebrations; this caused quite a stir! Because of Mary Ellen's recommendation, the arduous task of finding someone to relieve me for bathroom breaks was eliminated.  Yet and still, one of her most significant impacts on my life, from which I am still reaping its fruit, was her offering ME the opportunity to expand my knowledge of the business, which eventually led to a promotion.  Mary Ellen's integrity reminded me of things big and small that should never be tolerated—things which I had once desired to challenge but, over time, lost my passion to do so.

For these reasons, upon so many others, my heart feels heavy at the thought of her.  So the question is: "why didn't I keep my promise concerning her?!" I had said over and over in my mind that even though I'd found another job that I would ALWAYS stay in touch.  I can hear myself saying, "I've got to call Mary Ellen and tell her how well everything's going at my new job!...tell her how much fun I'm having being married!!...tell her how beautiful it is to bring a child into the world with someone you love!!!...tell her how much I enjoy being a mom and how I look forward to her seeing the beautiful son God gave us!!!! Finally, I wanted to share how much I learned from her, particularly how you can be an astute businesswoman, with authority, and yet behave as if you have none.  This amazing woman, of such impeccable character, knew how to stand up for what she believed in, EVEN if it created some waves; the difference was, she did it with a smile.

So again, the question returns to me, weighing heavily on my heart: "Why didn't you just go visit  like you said you would?!?!"  And then...reverbating softly in my ears, the answer comes back: "because I thought I would always have 'TOMORROW.'

Tuesday, August 13, 2013

The Soul of A Woman - How Deep Does She Go?

I stand as an advocate, a spiritual vigilante, if you will, for the rights of women who have no voice (at present), but they hunger and thirst for their voices to be heard.  A universal cry is what rings out - from  the grey haired woman to little girls, from the atheist,  to the Buddhist, to the Muslim, to the Christian, there is a wail that is common and longs to be heard... And I am here, drenched from head to toe, with your tears and your messages.  Some voices made silent, even cry out from the grave - their blood, spilled into the soil, has reached my Father's ears - therefore, it has reached mine.  So, I have made myself available to do and say what others cannot - No Matter the cost. My heart is open and bold on your behalf as NOW is the time for FREEDOM.   Go, make you ready.

Audio Release: "No Matter" part 1